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You Are Not Alone

Last week, as I woke up to the news that Donald Trump had been voted to become the President of the United States, I felt devastated. My feelings from Brexit back in June came back with double the ammo. As I tried to speak about my frustration and disappointment with people, many urged for me to think “It’s not that bad”, and to “think positive”. I couldn’t even think about the reality so how was I supposed to think about it positively? That’s when I felt really alone. Maybe I was overreacting. Maybe things weren’t that bad. But as I continued to voice my concerns and sadness openly, step by step, people started to come forward saying they felt the same. That’s when I realised I am not alone. And you are not alone either.

There is no doubt in my mind that we live in uncertain, scary times. It’s clear that people want change and it’s also clear that we have no idea what kind of change lies ahead. It’s also obvious that there are people like me and people like you out there. People who believe in the same things, who hope for a better world, and who are just as perplexed as we are right now, digesting all the latest shocking news.

Because of this, I wanted to do a different video blog this week. There’s no clear how-to or what you should do or what we should think or say.

Instead, this is me sharing my beliefs in what you are not alone in. I realised the more I spoke about the things that frustrated me, the more people came out saying they agreed. That’s when I realised sometimes just sharing what you believe in helps the right people to come forward in your life. Hopefully, by sharing my beliefs with you, you’ll realise you are not alone in believing in any one or more of them.

With that, I wish you love, light & happiness – and until next time…

Susanna


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18 Comments

  • Barbara says:

    I would like to say that I am a UK citizen and you are WELCOME here. Nearly half of the UK voted remain and we are devastated by the Brexit vote.

  • Marie says:

    Thank you for this video! These are scary times and we also need to remember to “be the change” we want to see in the world. Thanks for the reminder to absolutely process our feelings, and then get back to work on making the world a more loving place.

    • Absolutely!
      I’m a big believer that we’ve got to give ourselves the time to process difficult things – and then, like you said, ‘get back to work on making the world a more loving place.’ What a lovely line <3

  • Janet says:

    Thanks so much for you’re Video. I would say the last six months have Not been Happy for me. I am still trying to figure out my purpose, aim and Future, which all look bleak at present . Im past 50 years of age and still dont know this. Hopefully time will reveal all.

    • I’m sorry to hear you’ve been going through a tough time Janet.
      Finding your purpose is a big question to dive into, yet one that really helps us to feel fulfilled.
      I recommend you explore what your values are, when you feel most connected to yourself and the world, and what kind of positive impact you’d like to make on the world. Explore this both through reflection and by taking small steps forward into different directions. Every step will give you a reaction and you will know whether to stay on that path for another step or take a different path.
      You may also want to look into my book Screw Finding Your Passion: It’s Within You, Let’s Unlock It (http://bit.ly/screwfindingyourpassionbook). There is a whole chapter on purpose which might be useful for you <3

  • Evelyn says:

    Thank you Susanna.

    1. Would you mind posting the notes you read out as a downloadable reminder? They were very helpful

    2. “sometimes just sharing what you believe in helps the right people to come forward in your life.”

    I think this is important, but what if you end up getting hurt or rejected? I shared many life and work beliefs/fears with someone, and we connected over common problems and world issues. I thought here was a true friend. Then that person moved away, life is much better for them, and communication ended. Looking back, I fear that I shared too much and was too honest and open, so now I have shut down even more.

    I think the hurtful thing is that people seem to just look after themselves, and are not thinking about others as much. I feel that I try to reach out to others – befriending, consoling, advising, listening, yet I feel alone when I need that too. I do not know who is genuine and who I can really trust any more. I travel to work in a croweded train, yet no one is looking up, just down at their devices. People seem to fear to connect. I find this hard to deal with. How do we heal from this?

    • Hi Evelyn – Yes I will write the notes down separately after I’m back from my holiday in a week and share them here as well. Good idea! :)

      The reality of life is we will sometimes get hurt or rejected, regardless of whether we put our real self forward. We can’t predict it or avoid it, it is a simple part of life. Sometimes we also find ourselves feeling rejected or hurt without the other person knowing it. That’s why I always encourage open communication and if you are confused why your friend stop communicating with you, ask them! Then, regardless of whether the answer is a positive or negative one, you know whether to keep that friendship alive or realise you are better off focusing your energy on people who truly want to be in your life.

      You also never know what other people are going through and hence sometimes other people shut down from the world to protect themselves. I think this is why people are so stuck into their smartphones now. That means they don’t need to deal with their reality or their emotions, but they use their phone as escapism. It’s not healthy and we should be encouraging people to still talk and to connect, and that is really the only thing we can do as there are no guarantees how other people will behave.

      I would definitely encourage you to have open conversations with your closest family and friends who you feel you can trust, and simply tell them how you are feeling. Don’t accuse them of not being there for you, just tell them that you are feeling alone and that you would like to feel more listened to. Be prepared to also come up with suggestions to help your family and friends to listen to you better.

      Sometimes by focusing on healing ourselves we help to heal the world. Stay open and vulnerable and keep trying to connect, and eventually people will respond to your beautiful energy.

  • Heike-Alice Göbel says:

    Dear Susanna,

    thank you very much for your honesty…I relate to your words totally and I feel close to you.

    YES, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

    No matter what, with all the grief sharing light through darkness as good it can be. And if it is only a single small light, it is so valuable and comforting.

    With all my heart and compassion from Vienna,
    Heike-Alice

  • Susanna, Thank you for this video and sharing your heartfelt thoughts. I wrote this blog post myself when trying to process the Trump win: http://singleagainonlinediary.blogspot.com/2016/11/saddened-and-shocked-by-trump-win.html

    I’m furthered saddened that the election has created stress in my family, particularly between my sister, a Republican who voted for Trump, and me. Even though I never criticized her for her vote, I’ve been vocal about my embarrassment, fear, and sadness about a Trump Presidency and she is angry at me for not “accepting” it. I know she feels defensive and angry by all the people who are criticizing those, especially women, who voted for Trump. So we are both sad and angry.

    Your video was a good reminder that we need to take time to process and not give up on the values of loving kindness that we need to continue to exemplify. Thank you.

    • I’m so glad to hear you used writing to process your thoughts & emotions – it’s such a powerful way to do it!
      I’m sorry to hear that the election has cause stress in your family. It is a tricky time as people have voted for different things for different reasons, and it is hard to connect with people whose reasons you don’t necessarily understand.
      Remind yourself and your sister that despite your differences you are still family and deep down you still love each other and care for each other. You simply have a different opinion about a political matter, and you both are processing what it means and how the world has reacted to it.
      We will always stay strong on ‘the values of loving kindness that we need to continue to exemplify’ – what a beautiful phrase. Thank you for sharing.

  • Zoya says:

    Susanna hi,
    thank you.

    it is tricky sometimes- people’s relationship. I had a bad experience at a work’s place. At the beginning , it was lovely, people were friendly. But with time, something negative happened , (now I know it was a wrong interpretation of things ) So you smile less, trust people less.

    • Hi Zoya!
      Often in life we are faced with difficult experiences and sometimes things change for the worse.
      The key is acknowledging the situation and thinking about how you can change it back to the better.
      Communicate openly with your colleagues as the better you can understand each other the easier it is to develop relationships of trust. It doesn’t mean everyone will agree about everything or change their beliefs or opinions, but it does mean people will get a better idea of how people think and why.
      When this happens, it’s easier to communicate and work together more effectively without offending each other.
      Good luck!

  • Evelyn says:

    Susanna, thank you. Your response to my original post helped me a lot. I will keep trying. We all need so much healing and remember our humanity. Thank you. xxoo

  • Satya Singh says:

    Hi,Thank you for you passion for sharing your views and being so positive. The video resonated with me. I agree with you, that you are not alone. I sometimes feel the world has gone crazy.

    • Thank you for your kind, encouraging words <3
      I agree this year has definitely made the world feel a bit crazy - but like you say it's nice to know you're not alone in believing and working towards a better world. Sending you lots of love & light x

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